I Wish....

Are you ever floating through life, going through the motions, wishing your days away..."I can't wait until the weekend. I can't wait until October is over. I can't wait until I go on vacation. I can't wait until my kids can take care of themselves. I can't wait until...(fill in the blank)?"

Do you wonder why we do this as humans? Why do we wish our time away? We all have a finite amount of time in this world...shouldn't we be just holding on to every minute? Cherishing it...getting the most out of every single second we have, instead of wishing it away????

I am guilty of this, just like the next person. I look forward to my days off with my kids, but then I end up running around like a chicken with my head cut off. I try to do a million things, and only accomplish a few. I know there are things we have to do. There will ALWAYS be things we HAVE to do. We have to get groceries. We have to do laundry. We have to go to work. We have to cook supper. We have to do the dishes....the list goes on and on...but meanwhile, in the background...we have to live...we have to love...

A very common verse - everyone knows at least a part of it. It was read at our wedding.
1 Corinthians 13:4–8 (NIV)
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

So, let's dissect this.... "Love is patient..." Can I count the number of times in a day that I lose my patience?? Probably not. Some days are better than others, but I have to admit, this is definately my sin....I am NOT a patient person. There, I said it. I don't like waiting in line, I don't like crowds (because they slow me down), I don't like waiting on the phone, I don't like slow internet, I don't like slow drivers....it goes on and on. So would it come as a surprise that I have LOTS of work to do in this area (God isn't finished with me yet :) I vow to work on this area, at least when it comes to my kids. God help me be patient while my child takes FOREVER to pick out his clothes, FOREVER to tie his shoes. God help me patient while I read the same book, over and over every night to my child. God help me be patient when my littlest cries out for me in the middle of the night for the 5th time. God help me be patient because someday my kids will grow up and move away, and I will have to be patient while I wait for them to come and see me or call me...

"Love is kind..." I was recently reminded of this. We had been having a good day at the park. I warned Nick it was a couple minutes before it was time to go. However, when it WAS time to go, a meltdown ensued, which frustrated me. Why didn't this work? Why didn't my parenting skill come through? As we drove across town, I listened to him carrying on, and throwing a fit in the back seat. I tried the silent treatment. I answered occasionally when I felt necessary. I commented a few times. Then, my hubby called and I talked to him. After I hung up, Nick says to me (in a few dramatic voice), " Mommy, how can you talk so nice to Daddy and be mean to me?" Wow....huh??? Ouch....I know we all get caught up in the moment, but sometimes to stop and realize the things that come out of our mouths....ugh....God help me to be kind, even when I am frustrated, when I am tired, when I am sick, when I am mad....because all my kids want from me is unconditional love...

"It does not envy..." I haven't had a lot of years with my kiddos yet. But even as our kids are young, we all do it. We all compare. When did your kid starting walking, start talking, start riding a bike, blah blah blah....God help me to be joyful in MY kids own accomplishments, when THEY do them, and not compare them to others all the time. Help me to teach them to be happy with themselves, in the unique way that you made them, so THEY don't grow up comparing themselves to others all the time.

"it does not boast, it is not proud." As really only one of my kids is talking much, not a lot of experience in this area. I think you can be proud of what you do, as long as you realize that God has given you all the talents and ability to do what you do. God help me to grow and learn so that I may teach my kids to be confident without being boastful or proud.

"It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered..." Ever get mad when you are in public, when someone is rude to you? How do you respond? Do you respond with love? I can think of very few times in my life, when presented with this situation, where I didn't respond with equal rudeness or anger...God help me to teach my children to hold their tongue, to see the good in people, to not respond to rudeness with equal rudeness, but dissect it, and respond with love.

"it keeps no record of wrongs..." When you get hurt, do you forgive and forget? Do you keep it in the back of your mind? It's okay to learn from being hurt, but to continue to count these things, and continue to hold them against each other does us no good. God help me to keep my tongue quiet, so that my children will learn through example that you can forgive and forget and not keep score.

"Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth." The truth being said...we all fall short of the glory of God....but thank you Jesus for your grace. For loving us every day, for giving another chance, for giving us another 24 hrs to get it right. God help me teach my boys that the only truth comes through you.


"It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." So in all the chaos of today, the bottom line is this...love never fails. Don't fail your spouses; love them every day, even when they make you mad, even when you feel like it's the last straw, even when you feel like there is no hope... Don't fail your children; love them every day, even when they are slow, even when they don't do things you want them to do, even when they are different from other kids. And most of all, love yourself. This means taking care of yourself too. Do things that fill up your cup. Because if you are too worn out, you can't love anyone - not God, your spouse, or your children....You can't enjoy the little things. You will spend your time wishing it away, until there is no time left to wish...

My addiction....

I decided it's time to blog again (finally!), about what has been keeping me busy over the last few months (besides my two wonderful boys). So, in this world, there are many things one can be involved in/with. Some good, some bad. I have so far in my life, experienced a little of both.
Now let's talk addiction. The very definition of addiction is "the condition of being habitually or compulsively occupied with or involved in something." I think then in this case, yes, I have a new addiction. Thankfully, though annoying sometimes to others, I don't find this to be an unhealthy addiction.
Let me introduce you to Crossfit. What is that? It's a program that was developed by Greg Glassman in 2000. It's a high intensity, constantly varied, core and conditioning program which combines cardio, weights, and some gymnastics moves.
Now let me tell you, I am by no means an expert on Crossfit (not even close), but I WILL gladly talk to you about it with enthusiasm. I started doing it in the fall of 2010, but never really put a whole lot of effort into it until this spring/summer.
Unfortunately, I had a really rough winter. I suffered from post-partum depression and very poor body image. Though I continued to workout through my pregnancy, post-partum, and during my depression, I never really got what Crossfit could do for me.
Finally in February, I hit an all time low. I had enough and it was time to change. I hit an all time high (not pregnant) weight of 180 lbs and 40% body fat.
Though I don't claim to have suffered through a lifetime of obesity or such, I can see how those feelings can be a vicious circle. Not feeling good, eating to feel better, feeling worse....etc...
I would like to tell you I had some epiphany moment, but it is less clear than that. I literally woke up one day and said to myself, "I will not live like this. Being 180 lbs is not making me happy. Food serves two purposes - nutrition or pleasure. It gives me no pleasure to be 180 lbs, so it's time to change."
I continued to do Crossfit 4-6 times a week, but as I changed what nutrition I gave myself, I started to see changes. As the weight and inches cames off, all of a sudden I could do an unassisted pullups, toes to bar, handstand pushups, and even rope climbs. It was challenging, it was empowering. There are many studies done on the positive effects of exercise, and I can attest to those great endorphins. And then comes the addiction part, the more I learned to do, the more I wanted to do. Harder, faster, stronger, leaner....And so is born the addiction....
There is self-confidence that comes from our accomplishments. When we complete something hard, we feel good. When we overcome that fear, we feel better. This is what Crossfit is every DAY....Pushing yourself beyond what you THINK your limits are.
Now some will say there is no way they can do Crossfit, but that is what is SO cool about it...you can modify everything. So you can't do a rope climb yet? There are other ways to modify that movement until you can.
Not convinced yet? Let me show you evidence of hard work. Since the end of February, I have lost almost 40 lbs and 60 inches. I went from a size 12 to a size 6. But better than those numbers are, I gained back my self confidence. I know what it's like to work hard for a goal and acheive it. I am teaching my boys the importance of exercise (as the gym is a part of our normal routine at home and away from home)...and I attribute this all to Crossfit. I have been athletic my entire life. I played collegiate sports. I have NEVER worked out this hard, and loved it this much.

And why not give credit where credit is due....
First and foremost, to my God. Isaiah 40: 29-31. "He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint."

To my husband....Ephesians 5:25 "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her..."

To my friends...John 15:13 "Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends."

And lastly to my Coach and my Crossfit comrades...Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 "Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow..."

I guess there are plenty of things I could be addicted to...but I can be thankful that I found one that is healthy for me. If you ever want to come play, let me know...I would love to show you all the benefits of this wonderful thing I fell into.
And I will leave you with this Crossfit picture someone posted online...it pretty much sums it up :)

Phillipians 4:13 "I can do all things in Christ who gives me strength."

Jesus...my friend

Okay, okay....so my friend prompts me that it's been awhile since I blogged....Where did April go??? Well, come to think of it, where did May go?
Life just moves on, keeps going....whether or not we want it to.
So, I will blog about some thoughts I have had about the events of the last few months.
Let's start with Easter. Do you know the story of Easter? My 4 year old does. No, not the Easter bunny...the resurrection of Jesus...
It blows my mind that there are people who have never heard the story of Jesus. There are people whow have had no idea who He is, what He did, and the stories of the Bible. Now while I am certainly no Bible scholar, I did grow up Catholic and for that I am thankful. My Mom drug us (and literally sometimes it was a chore I'm sure) to church every week. We also went to catechism on Wednesday nights. While I am sure I groaned about it at the time, I am happy that I grew up knowing Jesus. And maybe we weren't as devout as some, but it was enough for us.
I no longer practice catholicism. It's just not for me. Some of my friends and many of my family still do though. I have nothing against it because I am firm believer that it doesn't matter how you worship, as long as you realize there is ONE God above, and we are all serving him.
During my college years, I dabbled in church. I went here and there, but nothing real regular. When I was looking for my soul mate, it was important to me that he be a Christian (and he was). We did get baptized together in 2002 - as he had never been.
Now Todd didn't grown up really in the church. His Mom or Grandparents took him occasionally, but it was not regular. No one had ever stopped to talk to him about it, until he had a couple of great paramedic partners that set him straight. Todd believed (as many do), that by doing good things, that would get him to heaven. And yes, while those things are important, they don't reserve our spot in heaven. It is only through believing in Him and making him your Saviour, that you are saved.

Now I have believed this as long as I can remember...Which brings me back to my original point...it baffles me that people grow up not knowing this, not hearing this, not having access to this information. However, I don't feel it my calling to preach on the pulpit, I would love it if all had access to this information.

It wasn't until a few years ago that I realized how important my personal relationship with Jesus is. Not that it is just something you do on Sunday, or do before eating, but that you can talk to him anytime, anywhere, and that little voice in your head telling your heart what to do, why that's the holy spirit talking to you....Now how could I have grown up and not felt this personal relationship to Him, I don't know, I guess I wasn't ready yet, not mature enough yet. But the saying is true, the more you know, the more you want to know - the more you seek out that relationship. And all those things happening that fall into place, well, that is Jesus' timing.

Well then why the tragedy? Why the suffering? I believe someday we shall see the purpose in everything, but I think the answers are so complex that we cannot even comprehend it with our human minds. This is the reason that we are not always meant to know why some things occur. Although our human mind feels that 80 or 85 is the age we should go to heaven, sometimes our duties here on earth are done before that.

Now, I'm not going to start a Holy war here - that is not my intention. Each person has a right to their own beliefs (Yeah America ). What I simply want to do is just get some of these thoughts out of my head :) and give people something to think about . Who/where is that person in your life, that you may come across every day, who doesn't know Jesus...is there anything you can do to help them know Jesus? I know there are many things I can do, and I will try to do better every day. I thank Him every day when I wake up, for giving me another 24 hours to get it right.

And I will leave you skeptics with this final thought. One of my absolute favorite sayings...
"IT WILL COST YOU NOTHING TO BELIEVE...AND EVERYTHING NOT TO..."


Phillipians 4:13 " I can do all things in Christ, who gives me strength."

Enjoy the journey....

Have you ever watched a child just shrieking with delight at something they are discovering or playing? I was reminded of this recently, when I watched a friend's video on her child running and playing while being sprayed with a hose. He was shrieking with joy, and when it was over, he asked for more. I thought to myself, I would have been mad if someone sprayed me with a cold hose. And then it came to me, why does the same thing bring about two totally different responses in a child and an adult?
Because as adults we are programmed to fit in to society. We are programmed to act a certain way. We have rules. On the other hand, tt's really amazing to watch children. You can just stand back and bathe in their joy... uncensored, unblocked from this cynical world we live in.
Why do we stop living this way? Why do we "grow up" and forget how fun it is to blow bubbles? How fun it is to sit in the sun and eat Popsicles? How interesting it is to watch ants? How you can hear the world's sounds if you just close your eyes and take it all in?
I remember when Nick was about 2. We used to walk down to our park all the time. It's about 2 blocks away, but to get there, it might take us like 20 minutes!!! Why you ask? Well, this little boy would stop and point out every worm in the cracks, look at all the rocks, pick up all the sticks, study the leaves, you name it....

At first, this used to frustrate my husband, who is very goal orientated, as he wanted to get to the park!! I mean really, that is the goal, right? After a few trips of frustration, I had to remind him to embrace who Nicholas really is...a curious learning little boy...enjoying the world...embracing life and all it's little things...
So there's a poem that I love, and I keep it in a file to read from time to time.
Just For Today
by Sally Meyer

Just for this morning,
I am going to smile when I see your face...
and laugh when I feel like crying.

Just for this morning,
I will let you wake up softly in your flannel p.j.'s...
and hold you until you are ready to stir.

Just for this morning,
I will let you choose what you want to wear...
and I will say how beautiful you are.

Just for this morning,
I will step over the laundry to pick you up...
and take you to the park to play

Just for this morning,
I will leave the dishes in the sink...
and let you teach me how to put your puzzle together.

Just for this afternoon,
I will unplug the telephone and keep the computer off...
and sit with you in the garden
blowing bubbles.

Just for this afternoon,
I will not yell once, not even a tiny grumble when you
scream and whine for the ice cream truck...
and I will buy you one, if he comes by.

Just for this afternoon,
I won't worry about what you are going to be
when you grow up...
I will simply love you for the joy you bring me

Just for this afternoon,
I will let you help me make cookies...
and I wont stand over you . . . trying to 'fix things.'

Just for this afternoon,
I will take you to McDonald's and buy us both a 'Happy Meal'...
so you can have two toys.

Just for this evening,
I will hold you in my arms and tell you the story of how you
were born...
and how much we love you.

Just for this evening,
I will let you splash in the bathtub...
and I won't get angry when you pour water over your sister's
head.

Just for this evening,
I will let you stay up late...
while we sit on the porch swing
and count all the stars.

Just for this evening,
I will bring you glasses of water...
and snuggle beside you for hours...
and miss my favorite t.v. show.

And tonight when you are sleeping safe and warm in your bed,
I will think of the mothers and fathers
who mourn for the children they have lost.

I will remember the parents who sit by hospital beds,
watching over the little ones they love.

I will weep for those parents whose children are cold,
hungry and suffering,

and .... this evening,
when I kneel down to pray,
I will simply be grateful for all that I have

and not ask for anything...

except just one more day.


© copyright 1999 Sally Meyer

ENJOY THE JOURNEY KIDS....NOT THE DESTINATION....


"This is the day the Lord has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it." Psalm 118:24

For better or worse...

Today I celebrate 14 years of marriage with my wonderful husband. We have known each other for 16 years and been together for 15 years....and where does time go????

Now if you know us, you will know that it hasn't been all wedded bliss...There was a point in our marriage where we were actually separated and lived apart for 6 months. It's not something I am proud of, but I am very open about this with anyone when the topic comes up and this is why.

We all have rough spots in our marriage. Times when we aren't close, times when we want to throw in the towel, times when we feel like maybe someone else would be better for us...If you disagree then either #1 - you are deceiving yourself or #2 - it just hasn't happened to you yet.

I am sad to say that during that time of separation, my relationship with Jesus, wasn't what it is now. But, I am happy to say that we made it through two very rough spots, and we are closer to God, and have a stronger relationship because of it.

The other thing that helped us through was the support and love from our family and friends. We couldn't have done it without any of them. They were there to listen (again and again) and encourage us to not give up on each other. They were good examples of marriages for us to follow.

When we share about our past, people often ask us how we got past all the anger, hurt, and living apart. We are honest and tell them that it was a long time after those troubles where things were still not good. I would be trying and Todd would be done, and then vice verse...But our answer simply remains the same...in the end, it was nothing but the Grace of God that got us through....

I can only hope and pray that we will get to celebrate at least another 3 rounds of 14 years together....

Hosea 2:19
"And I will betroth you to me forever. I will betroth you to me in righteousness and in justice, in steadfast love and in mercy."

Gifts from God....

Today is a new day. God gives us 24 hrs to get it right again...
Sometimes weekends are long days with our kids, lots to do, tired, worn out, household chores, etc etc etc....
But, today is a new day. We get 24 hrs, 1440 minutes, 86400 seconds to do it all over again.
Have you ever just stood back and watched your children? I mean really, just took in the excitement in their eyes when they find a little treasure on the ground, even if it's just a silly little rock. Have you ever watched their face light up when they see their Daddy? Have you ever just hugged your child, and asked God for one more chance to get it right?


I have...Because as parents, we all make mistakes. We do things we wish we wouldn't have. We say things we wish we wouldn't have. We lose our patience. We rush our children. We drag them through our daily chaos (I am really guilty of this one).
I was listening to K-Love radio last night (if you haven't heard this station - find it where you are - it's awesome - and my kids love it too!!). They were talking about parenting, and they said, there's 3 things our kids need from us....
#1 - Our love. Now most of us get this right. Kids need our hugs, our kisses, our unconditional love. This one is easy I think :)
#2 - Kids need limits. We aren't crushing their spirit or damaging them for life. They NEED limits. They need rules, stability, and to know that they can't just do whatever they want, when they want. Teaching them right from wrong in a loving way. You CAN discipline YOUR child....not PUNISH them...DISCIPLINE them. Look it up in the dictionary, there is a difference....
#3 - They need our time!!! This is not one of those things that is just "quality time." With kids you can't get quality time without getting quantity of time!!!

Something to think about. Sure gives me some things to remember and try to work on.
Often when I am super frustrated, or had a really bad day with the kids, I try to remember that somewhere, some mother/father would give anything to hold their child again, and I thank God for my gifts.
Psalm 127:3 "Children are a heritage from the LORD, offspring a reward from him."
And so I will leave you with this quote I saw this morning that sums up how I feel about parenting....

"While we try to teach our children all about life, children teach us what life is all about."

Cuz Every Girl Is Crazy 'Bout A Sharp Dressed Man!

It all started when Nick was about two. He was so independent. I would let him dress himself. It was VERY helpful to me! I was so proud of him. I thought I had him trained, but boy was I wrong!! He would bring the outfit he picked into me and say, "Does this match?" And I would say, "No, pick another pair of pants, etc." Well, I remember an incident one morning before I went to work. Nick and Todd were in his room, and Nick had got himself dressed. He was wearing a purple shirt and red pants. I told him it didn't match and to get different pants. A meltdown ensued...(me or Nick???) Todd was saying, "What does it matter?" And I specifically remember saying (out loud I might add), "It looks stupid because it doesn't match." Meanwhile, my kid is crying and carrying on. I leave for work. I am actually mad I tell you. Steaming mad...
And then it hits me....really Christine? You are mad because your 2 year old wants to wear red pants and a purple shirt....That IS stupid. So, I have to apologize to my 2 year old (I'm sure it won't be the last time), for being mad and not saying a nice thing (we don't say stupid in our house).
So from that moment on I decided, "Choose your battles wisely." And that is not one that I choose to fight. And so was born, my little eccentric Nicholas Edward Allen.
Let me tell you about my little man. He has a personality all his own. I say quite often to my mother, "You never know what Nick is gonna do." And this is so true, and I love him for it!

Nicholas to me, is one in a million. When he gets up in the morning, he knows EXACTLY what he wants to wear. He will say, "Mom, where is my BUG shirt," or something to that liking. If I get the privilege of helping him get dressed, he will sit on the bed while I flip through the shirts, until he decides which one he wants to wear. Then he will have decide exactly what pants he wants to wear, what shoes, what socks, and so the list goes. He has a drawer full of colorful socks of various characters (I just love socks, and thank you target for having kids character socks for $1), and he will search for exactly the right pair to go with his outfit.

Shoes is a whole other story. You never know what he will be in the mood for. My husband gave me a hard time when he was 2 because I bought him a $10 pair of brown horsey rain boots at Orscheln's. He said, "those are a waste of money." Boy did he eat his words. When Nick started liking those, he wore those boots with EVERYTHING, and nearly wore off the heel!!! We have worn cowboy boots with both sweats and shorts. The sky is the limit!
Also somewhere between 2-3 years old comes a very determined little boy. He latched on to a few articles of clothing SO MUCH that I found myself washing them A LOT! First we had our "hun-un sweat pants." This was when he was learning to talk and for some reason, we got that name, which we are not still sure what he meant, but if he said "hun-un sweat pants," we knew exactly what pair he was referring to.
To us, there was nothing special about them, just a normal nylon slick pair of royal blue pants with black/white stripes on the side. But to that kid, it was his favorite pair. So much so, I actually searched ebay for another pair exactly like those (to no avail). With the "hun-un sweat pants," came the "bear hirt (aka bear shirt)." This was a shirt we got him from a trip to Colorado that had a grizzly bear on it. Again, I searched high and low for an extra "bear hirt," but again no luck. And lastly, we had our Buzz Lightyear jammies. Now these are original jammies from the original Toy Story, worn by my nephew Colton. These jammies were 10 years old! But they were so cool, they had wings!! Searched again for an extra pair after a meltdown one night because I had to wash them, and again came up empty handed. Hence this Mama did a lot of laundry in those days. I would literally have to bargain with him, wash them and give them right back! Silly, huh??? Yes, but have you ever seen a kid meltdown???

So anyways, back to the story. I don't want you to think I am some kind of hippy or crazy Mom who never battles over this. I do. I just choose when it's time to battle, and I have learned how to use the best weapons. Nick is a kid who absolutely LOVES clothes. He is my kid who when I say we are going to Target, he says, "Can I get a new shirt there?" He doesn't ask for toys hardly ever, but if you get him a new shirt, you will be his friend for life. And you can tell if he likes it, because he will put it on RIGHT away. Seriously, I have seen him strip right in the store. Now he even knows he can put it on before we pay if he gives me the tags. So if I want him to wear a special shirt for say Christmas eve church or something, I promise to get him a new outfit (who doesn't love new outfits for special occasions??). But, I have also learned to do this VERY close the event, otherwise, he will wear it right away, and when the big day comes, he won't want to wear it.
Yes, my Nicholas is quite the character. People tell me they are always looking to see what he will be wearing, because "you just don't know about Nicholas!" So what was once a source of frustration, is now a sense of pride. Instead of crushing that free spirit to fit in the box of what we find acceptable, I have let him flourish. And this is just what Nicholas does and he does it well. He doesn't care if he wears jammies to Dillons, if he has cowboy boots with shorts, if his colors match (because to him they ALL match). All he cares about is that he gets to choose (and hopefully it's clean :)

So I say to you little man, keep marching. Keep on marching to the beat of your own drum and don't let the world tell you NO! Because in the end....Every Girl Is Crazy 'Bout A Sharp Dressed Man!
Romans 12:2 MSG "Don't become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You'll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you."

Learning to accept the cards we are dealt.

As promised previously, my blog titled as above.
Let me tell you about Lucas. Lucas Oliver is my 2nd child. He is named after my Grandmother Lucille Olive Hazlett. My grandmother was a wonderful woman. I miss her every day. She made quite an impact on my life, and it saddens me that my children will grow up without her. It's encouraging that we will all get to meet her in heaven one day. She was one of those people who as she would say, "never met a stranger." I loved going over to her house and just laying on the couch, eating M & M's and listening to her stories.









So back to Lucas...He is such a happy baby. Always smiling at other's. Very good disposition.......EXCEPT....he is NOT a good sleeper. We thought maybe it was his ears, as he had 5 ear infections and finally got tubes in January, but NO...still NOT a good sleeper.


Oh, he has his moments, but all in all, just not a good sleeper. I have tried everything. Tylenol or motrin before bed, benadryl, let him cry it out. Let me tell you, that kid can cry it out with the best of them. He cried all the way to the Topeka Zoo. Another night, while crying it out, it went on for about 3 hrs...and he was not letting in. So my Mom says to me, "What are you going to do?" Well, what can you do? Pretty much nothing....you learn to accept the cards you are dealt. Now while you know the saying, "God won't give us more than we can handle." I frequently follow that by saying, "Pretty sure he thinks I'm stronger than I am."
Now sometimes, I am a hard learner. I don't quite get it right away. I'm stubborn. (Gee, I wonder where Lucas gets it from.) How did I learn to accept this when sleep is one of my favorite things? Here's my story.
I met a patient of mine. Her baby boy was born in June (Lucas was born in May). During delivery, her placenta ruptured. Her baby was without oxygen, and hence suffers from now many disabilities, one which is being blind. It was like all of a sudden a light bulb went off in my head...Hello Christine!!!!
"Um, hello God, it's me Christine. I had an epiphany moment today. Thank you for my children. My two healthy boys. I am blessed beyond measure. Amen."
So, although the dealer has known my cards since before I was born, and I received my hand and decided to hold'em. I have learned to accept the fact that although I am not holding an ace and a ten spot...I am holding two kings, and for that I will be forever grateful....
1 Samuel 1:27 "I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him."

Be courageous....it's just dirty laundry...

Like any Mom, our laundry pile sometimes reaches gigantic proportions. I mean really, I think it multiplies while we sleep. I seriously don't know how a mother of more than two can keep up. Are there little laundry ninjas that help you when no one is looking?
This is Nick's random thing for the weekend....He yells at Daddy to come here.
"Daddy, put me in the basket, I want to be a piece of dirty laundry (as if I don't have enough dirty laundry already)." Ok....hmmmm....Kids say the weirdest things.

Back to the story...so, I have a TON of laundry to do. I mean really, I think it was like two weeks worth. Here is my problem. I don't mind washing and drying the laundry, but somehow, the last steps of folding and putting away, well, they haunt me. Everytime I do this, I say to myself, "Don't let it get this far next time," but it always does.
So, in our chaotic little world yesterday, we had family pictures at the lake. It went quite well actually, but it did take up our afternoon. After getting back home, I proceeded to get Luke down for a nap, and the boys went to target to get Nick his super cool new shoes (future blog - "If these shoes really were magic..."). After that, we played outside until the sun went down, because after all, when is it 60 degrees in February! Then basically our evenings go like this, eat supper, baths, and bedtime routine. It pretty much starts at 7 and ends at 830. We are finally getting our groove back, and it's nice to have a routine again (only took us 9 mos after Lucas arrived :)
After all that fun, we went and worked out in the basement, and collapsed (literally) on the couch. Well, we have this movie that I got Todd for Valentine's day called Courageous. We have really been trying to find time to watch it, and relax together.
My wonderful husband says to me, "Why don't we sit down and watch this tonight, and I will fold all the laundry tomorrow." Gee honey, twist my arm....OK! (and by the way - he really followed through with this promise today!) Well let me tell you about the movie Courageous, this movie is A-MAZ-ING!!!! If you haven't seen it, I really want you to go out and get it. Buy it. It is worth EVERY penny. WE were both VERY touched by the movie, and hopefully, as every days goes by, a little closer to Jesus, and who he wants us to be.
The bottom line is this...we ALL have dirty laundry. Jesus knows this. He sees right through it, and the awesome thing is, he LOVES us anyway. So kids, keep on tackling those dirty laundry piles cuz let me tell you...the end result is going to be worth all the work.....
Joshua 24:15 "...But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.”

Not today....

Have you ever woke up and not wanted to be you today? I mean really, let's be honest. Today is one of those days. I woke up, and I don't wanna be a Mom, a wife, a friend, anything...I just wanna go back to the carefree 20 year old without any responsibilities but myself.
Now, before you go getting all judgy judgerton on me, let me explain. I love being a wife. I love being a Mom. I love being a friend people can rely on. These are things that define my character. I would give my life for any of the above listed jobs. It's a choice I make every day.
But, this is a lot of responsibility. Sometimes it's very overwhelming, and life just gets the best of us. That's today....
But, the good news is, Jesus tells us not to concern ourselves with things of this life, to lift our eyes towards heaven. So, when I am having a day like today, I try to remember that. John 16:33 " I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world."
On days like today, I remember a song by Gretchen Wilson. The lyrics go like this, "I don't feel like loving you today....but you know I will anyway." So, like every other day. We will trudge on. We will put on a happy face. We will do what needs to be done. We will be a good Mom, a good wife, a good friend....
And when we hear those little words, "Mommy, I love you..." all will be forgotten...

A stitch in time....

Well, this wasn't exactly how I envisioned my Sunday off....It was beautfiul outside. We went to church, enjoyed a nice picnic at the park, and were playing on the playground. I was down below holding Luke, and Nick was at the top, doing what he always does I'm sure, RUNNING....Seriously, this kid started not walking, but running at 10.5 mos...and he has never slowed down since.

As I made my retreat to the swings, I heard a familiar screaming, and I knew immediately it was my child. There just happened to be a Mom at the top and she walked him to the slide and I put Luke down on the ground (where he commenced to eating leaves - fiber!), and met Nick on the slide. One look confirmed my suspicion when skin meets durable steel with a firm impact, gaping laceration and chipped tooth. I calmly got a kleenex out of my pocket, as the Mom at the top asked if I needed a napkin, and would he would be okay. I thanked her, and said he will need stitches and we will have to go (Nick had been having so much fun playing with her son Emerson!)



I kept calm the whole time. I kept repeating to myself, "Don't make their emergency, your emergency (ie don't freak out)" I got both kids buckled in, and was just helping Nick get a fresh kleenex when Luke coughed really hard (has a little cold), and threw up all over. Now my Mom says God won't give me more than I can handle, but really God?????

Home we went to wake up Daddy (he worked night shift last night), who agreed with my diagnosis. We put a bandaid on. Nick told me a little later, "it's feeling better Mommy," "Sorry kiddo, we still have to fix it, " although we didn't talk about it anymore, because intially when I talked to Todd and mentioned stitches, he freaked out. Todd goes to work at 5, so we agreed to take Nick in and fix it then. There are some benefits to being in medicine. Nick basically got spoiled all afternoon - popsicles, movies, etc. Don't think I ever told him no...As the afternoon came to an end Nick said, "I have to go and get stitches, but just one Mommy." Okay Nick, yeah, just one :)

At 5, we headed off to the ER. Thank goodness for Grandma Turtle, who came to watch Luke so I could be there for Nick. Nick settled in to the room, watching SpongeBob - which is a treat for him, because I don't allow it at my house! We put some medicine topically on it while we waited. Then came time for the hard part. Nick did SO good. Do you ever sit back in awe at your kids when they exceed your expectations? It's such a great feeling. I was SO proud of him, and proud of Daddy for the awesome work he did. Also, a big thank you to our friend Ryan for his help. When we left he said, "that wasn't bad, except for the hurty part (ie needle)."



When it was all said and done, he got 4 inside stitches, and 8 outside stitches. Such a trooper. Afterwards, we went to the park and played. Any fear that would have stopped a normal child, was immediately absent. We ran and jumped and played until the sun went down. Of course, notice I mentioned RUN...and what did we do??? trip and fall again!! Just a scratch on our hand this time. Slow down child...Finally, off to get his favorite supper, Wendy's hamburger.

MY DADDY - MY HERO!!!!











And when it's all said and done....little boy is all tuckered out....

When enough is too much....

This week we had a challenge offered by our church, University Christian Church. Instead of an offering this week, bring one full outfit for the people of Haiti. My mother-in-law, Dori, and I had a great time shopping. We had fun, and it felt good to be able to do this. We were able to send 9 total outfits together to Haiti. But, why you ask???
Well, in Haiti, you cannot attend church if you do not have the proper attire. This is NOT a church rule, this is a societal rule. So, this deters many people from being able to attend and ever HEAR about Jesus, let alone become a believer.
While I think this is an awesome cause, some of my friends would argue that we first need to help the people in our own country. They would say we have people here who need clothing, food, and assistance. While I am sure that is true, let's take a moment to examine the facts here.
Fact 1 - there is state aid available to many people in the United States that doesn't exist in other countries.
Fact 2 - While some children or adults might be without a little, we really have NO idea of what starvation is in our society. Take an example that was told to us from the recent trip to Haiti. A mother is waiting in line to get medical attention. Workers there notice one of her 4 children are crying, and she is scolding the child. When the woman is helped, they ask her why the child is crying and why is she scolding them? Her answer, "He's crying because he is hungry. I am scolding him because it's not his day to eat." Take that in for a minute....it's not his DAY to eat....Maybe I live in a sheltered world, but I have never know of this type of starvation in America. This breaks my heart...
Fact 3 - The Bible tells us to help ALL of God's people. Not just our own. Not just the ones who believe what we do, but ALL. 1 John 3:17
"But whoever has the world's goods, and beholds his brother in need and closes his heart against him, how does the love of God abide in him?"

So today at church, at the end of the sermon, he asked for all to start bringing up the offerings. It was SO amazing to see all the sacks of clothing for Haiti. I found myself crying. What an amazing thing that Jesus has done....It made my heart feel good and know that some day in Haiti, some man, woman or child, will get to go and hear about the gospel, because of these generous gifts. Can you imagine a country where you aren't able to just go outside in the clothing you have, where you can be persecuted for your religion? Where you don't even get the oppportunity to HEAR about Jesus, let alone, decide if you believe....
I cannot...and for that I am grateful....Today, I learned a lesson. I'm sure I've learned it before, and I'm sure I will need to be reminded again, but today it hit home....there are times in our lives when we complain about what we have or don't have, but in our country, enough is really too much....

When I am a parent, I will NEVER....(fill in the blank)

So, we have all done it as parents...made that mental list PRIOR to being parents, of things we would NEVER do when we have kids. I'm guilty. I made that list. I can name a few things on it. Some I have stuck to, and other's, well....not so much. First, in my defense, I think you can chalk it up to idiocracy. I mean really, how can you possibly make a "to do" or "not to do" list, on a topic you have no experience in. You are seriously setting yourself up for failure. Secondly, why in the world do I make so many lists???? I mean God himself could not complete some of my crazy lists....again, setting myself up for failure....


Case in point...on our list of NEVER to do things, was letting our kids sleep in our bed. By golly, that bed is for us, and we need our quiet time as a couple. Ha ha, and HA!


Background information first, before you make judgement. Okay, we were really good at this rule with Nick when he was smaller. Nick slept in his crib until he was 2.5 years old. He simply was outgrowing it by that point. So, we moved him straight to a double bed. Why waste time with these transitional beds!!!! So, in the middle of the night, if he got up, we would march him back to his bed, and sometimes even lay with him in his bed, until he fell asleep. This is going great. We are pretty good at this parent thing. And we are sticking to our rules!!!


AND then Lucas came along...Now, it's not fair to blame this poor baby. It surely isn't that sweet little smiley boy's fault?? However, he did throw our whole world into a tailspin again!! Well to say the least, Lucas is not a good sleeper. It's okay, I've accepted that (more on this topic in a future post to be called "Learning to accept the cards we are dealt.") So having said that, working BUSY mother, sleeps wherever and whenever she can! So, that causes child number one, who also wants Mommy to come lay with him, new sleeping issues.


So, what is the scenario? Well, (I say as I giggle), that rule is gone now. Went to the wayside of fictional life -vs- real life. Nick comes into our room almost every night and sleeps beside me on my half of the king size bed (thank goodness we have a king bed). I could have stopped him when it first started. I could have got up and took him back to his bed...but darn, I was tired already. Todd could have stopped him, but let's be honest, a freight train could come through our bedroom and he would never know it :) So, I say, "it is what it is."


I try to rationalize it by saying, "you know they are only young once, and it won't be forever that he wants to do this. (at least one would hope)." But the bottom line is, I failed at this NEVER list....maybe next time I will do my homework before trying to make a list that I know nothing about. Survival of the fittest baby....survival of the fittest....

Never a dull moment...

Think I have forgotten how to blog....It's been over 2 years since I did this.....Welcome to my life...Mother of one first, now two...and I work part time, so you think I would have time to spare, NOT! I will try a little better to blog this time. Don't always have to have all this magic stuff going on....but just get my thoughts down on the computer, and be able to blog some of the funny things that happen on my day to day journey...The life of a mother is never dull. It's finding the funny moments, enjoying the small things, crying over spilled milk, crying over sappy songs and commercials about kids, laughing at yourself, laughing at other mother's crazy days, and sharing it all with the 3 most important people on earth...my 2 boys, and my husband (who is on this chaotic rollercoaster ride with me)....